listening skills. Listening skills mean you hear what was said, you understand what was said, and you can make the proper judgment of what was said.

3. Learn to ask questions. Speaking skills involve, words, gestures, expression, pitch, and tone, which leave a lot of room for mischief on the part of both speaker and listener. So ask: “Did I understand you correctly when you said….?.” “Did you understand me when I said….?” And any number of variations that act as an aid in making sure that misunderstanding is not bogging down communication.

So there you have it in three simple steps. Should you now be thinking that’s

Regardless that there are those who appear to speak just to hear themselves talk, the whole purpose of striving to improve on ones speaking skills is to develop the effectiveness by which we express ourselves to the listener or, in the case of public speaking; listeners. In other words, to put it in simpler terms; how and what we communicate is for the benefit of those listening and not for ourselves.

With that now out of the way, we can move on to the areas where speaking skills come into play. Certainly, the ability to effectively communicate presents itself in the workplace and in all manner of public forums, but it is in the setting of interpersonal communication, where so much misunderstanding and miscommunication takes place. Were it otherwise, divorce attorneys would no longer be able to make a living, family courts would cease to exist, and Dr. Phil, would no longer find enough people or subjects to fill an hour of weekly TV airtime.

Admittedly, glaring miscommunication and misunderstanding due to culture and politics abound on the world stage, but that is a whole other matter that is in the hands of governments and diplomats to deal with. As for the rest of us, we need to learn how to speak to each other, and there, as Shakespeare would put it ‘is the rub’. Sadly, it is a lot easier to teach someone public speaking skills, workplace communication skills, writing skills, negotiation skills, and sales skill, then it is to verse someone in interpersonal speaking skills. Now why do you suppose that is?

Well, for starters, it is because all the other forms of communication skills have a certain structure to them, whereas interpersonal communications can take place anywhere, at any time, and for any reason, which translates to you having less control. Which leaves as with only three pieces of advice to give you on developing speaking skills, and although we're focusing on interpersonal speaking skills, this advice works just as well for all other arenas that call for speaking skills:

1. Pause and breathe. Yes, you’re right that this is like the old advice of count to 10 before you respond, however, it’s the same but different. Namely, before launching into an emotionally charged tirade over something that was said to you, take a deep breath, than another, and then three more. Five is enough just make sure that each one is deeper and fuller than the previous one. No, you do not need to know why you should do this; just do it, and you’ll learn the why of it for yourself.

2. Learn listening skills. Listening skills mean you hear what was said, you understand what was said, and you can make the proper judgment of what was said.

3. Learn to ask questions. Speaking skills involve, words, gestures, expression, pitch, and tone, which leave a lot of room for mischief on the part of both speaker and listener. So ask: “Did I understand you correctly when you said….?.” “Did you understand me when I said….?” And any number of variations that act as an aid in making sure that misunderstanding is not bogging down communication.

So there you have it in three simple steps. Should you now be thinking that’s

he setting of interpersonal communication, where so much misunderstanding and miscommunication takes place. Were it otherwise, divorce attorneys would no longer be able to make a living, family courts would cease to exist, and Dr. Phil, would no longer find enough people or subjects to fill an hour of weekly TV airtime.

Admittedly, glaring miscommunication and misunderstanding due to culture and politics abound on the world stage, but that is a whole other matter that is in the hands of governments and diplomats to deal with. As for the rest of us, we need to learn how to speak to each other, and there, as Shakespeare would put it ‘is the rub’. Sadly, it is a lot easier to teach someone public speaking skills, workplace communication skills, writing skills, negotiation skills, and sales skill, then it is to verse someone in interpersonal speaking skills. Now why do you suppose that is?

Well, for starters, it is because all the other forms of communication skills have a certain structure to them, whereas interpersonal communications can take place anywhere, at any time, and for any reason, which translates to you having less control. Which leaves as with only three pieces of advice to give you on developing speaking skills, and although we're focusing on interpersonal speaking skills, this advice works just as well for all other arenas that call for speaking skills:

1. Pause and breathe. Yes, you’re right that this is like the old advice of count to 10 before you respond, however, it’s the same but different. Namely, before launching into an emotionally charged tirade over something that was said to you, take a deep breath, than another, and then three more. Five is enough just make sure that each one is deeper and fuller than the previous one. No, you do not need to know why you should do this; just do it, and you’ll learn the why of it for yourself.

2. Learn listening skills. Listening skills mean you hear what was said, you understand what was said, and you can make the proper judgment of what was said.

3. Learn to ask questions. Speaking skills involve, words, gestures, expression, pitch, and tone, which leave a lot of room for mischief on the part of both speaker and listener. So ask: “Did I understand you correctly when you said….?.” “Did you understand me when I said….?” And any number of variations that act as an aid in making sure that misunderstanding is not bogging down communication.

So there you have it in three simple steps. Should you now be thinking that’s

put it ‘is the rub’. Sadly, it is a lot easier to teach someone public speaking skills, workplace communication skills, writing skills, negotiation skills, and sales skill, then it is to verse someone in interpersonal speaking skills. Now why do you suppose that is?

Well, for starters, it is because all the other forms of communication skills have a certain structure to them, whereas interpersonal communications can take place anywhere, at any time, and for any reason, which translates to you having less control. Which leaves as with only three pieces of advice to give you on developing speaking skills, and although we're focusing on interpersonal speaking skills, this advice works just as well for all other arenas that call for speaking skills:

1. Pause and breathe. Yes, you’re right that this is like the old advice of count to 10 before you respond, however, it’s the same but different. Namely, before launching into an emotionally charged tirade over something that was said to you, take a deep breath, than another, and then three more. Five is enough just make sure that each one is deeper and fuller than the previous one. No, you do not need to know why you should do this; just do it, and you’ll learn the why of it for yourself.

2. Learn listening skills. Listening skills mean you hear what was said, you understand what was said, and you can make the proper judgment of what was said.

3. Learn to ask questions. Speaking skills involve, words, gestures, expression, pitch, and tone, which leave a lot of room for mischief on the part of both speaker and listener. So ask: “Did I understand you correctly when you said….?.” “Did you understand me when I said….?” And any number of variations that act as an aid in making sure that misunderstanding is not bogging down communication.

So there you have it in three simple steps. Should you now be thinking that’s

cusing on interpersonal speaking skills, this advice works just as well for all other arenas that call for speaking skills:

1. Pause and breathe. Yes, you’re right that this is like the old advice of count to 10 before you respond, however, it’s the same but different. Namely, before launching into an emotionally charged tirade over something that was said to you, take a deep breath, than another, and then three more. Five is enough just make sure that each one is deeper and fuller than the previous one. No, you do not need to know why you should do this; just do it, and you’ll learn the why of it for yourself.

2. Learn listening skills. Listening skills mean you hear what was said, you understand what was said, and you can make the proper judgment of what was said.

3. Learn to ask questions. Speaking skills involve, words, gestures, expression, pitch, and tone, which leave a lot of room for mischief on the part of both speaker and listener. So ask: “Did I understand you correctly when you said….?.” “Did you understand me when I said….?” And any number of variations that act as an aid in making sure that misunderstanding is not bogging down communication.

So there you have it in three simple steps. Should you now be thinking that’s

listening skills. Listening skills mean you hear what was said, you understand what was said, and you can make the proper judgment of what was said.

3. Learn to ask questions. Speaking skills involve, words, gestures, expression, pitch, and tone, which leave a lot of room for mischief on the part of both speaker and listener. So ask: “Did I understand you correctly when you said….?.” “Did you understand me when I said….?” And any number of variations that act as an aid in making sure that misunderstanding is not bogging down communication.

So there you have it in three simple steps. Should you now be thinking that’s it is easier said than done, you would be right. DO IT ANYWAY!