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• You've become very friendly with a bartender

After a hard day of Monster grind, it's all too easy to reach for the vodka. Or the whisky, gin, wine or beer. Because, let's face it, alcohol works. After a few stiff ones, you'll definitely feel better. With the sharp, spiky edges of the day nicely softened, it's easier to forget about the office reality. But after another Tuesday night of Martini Madness, you won't sleep too well. You'll wake up bleary, nauseous, and possibly even more depressed tWhen you're a writer working for a paycheck, you quickly learn to dread the dawning of a new work day. So how do you handle the daily challenge of showing up the office when you'd rather be working on your novel? You have two choices when dealing with your Day Job Monster.

1. You can tether your Monster to a leg of your desk, where he'll do the least amount of damage,

or

2. You can let him rampage wildly all over your life, running up a huge damages bill you'll never be able to pay.

Unless you're completely masochistic, option one is probably a lot more appealing. But you may have already chosen option two, because you didn't realize there was an alternative to the day job dominating your life. If you did choose the nastier option, I'm guessing you're pretty unhappy. Recognize yourself in any of these behaviors?

• You look for ways to stay angry

How do you spend an average work night? Do you replay the day's Horror Highlights in your head? Do you fume about how much writing you could have done if only you didn't have to work? Do you start obsessing about the toxic nature of your office culture? Spend your evenings thinking about the Day Job Monster, and you can guarantee you'll be anxious, angry and frustrated most of the time.

• You argue with your partner a lot more than you used to

Do you complain about the tedium of the day to your partner until he or she can really take no more? This habit can quickly develop into a nightly screaming match about how you can't handle your job. You end up feeling lonely, misunderstood, and desperately unhappy. When you'd rather be writing full time, your day job is going to frustrate you. It's unavoidable. But the fact you have to work to pay the bills is probably not your partner's fault. And, it's true, maybe your partner doesn't really get the full picture.

People who are not stuck in a job that's driving them nuts can never fully comprehend the misery of the day job world. If your partner doesn't understand the agony you endure on a daily basis, you may have to find a way to be forgiving. Because you need the good parts of your life. They remind you of what's really important; they give you the strength to face the Monster, and to keep working on your writing dream.

• You're addicted to negative emailing

Isn't it tempting to arrive at work, fire up your computer and start the day by emailing the three human beings in your building about the appalling quality of your life? It might make you feel better for a couple of minutes. Only thing is, you'll get a volley of negativity in return. Because other people are also struggling with their Day Job Monsters. Do you want to take on their problems as well? Surely your own experience is painful enough! And what if you email that savagely sarcastic message to the wrong cubicle dweller by mistake? Before long, the boss gets to read it, and suddenly your day becomes so very much worse.

• You've become very friendly with a bartender

After a hard day of Monster grind, it's all too easy to reach for the vodka. Or the whisky, gin, wine or beer. Because, let's face it, alcohol works. After a few stiff ones, you'll definitely feel better. With the sharp, spiky edges of the day nicely softened, it's easier to forget about the office reality. But after another Tuesday night of Martini Madness, you won't sleep too well. You'll wake up bleary, nauseous, and possibly even more depressed th. If you did choose the nastier option, I'm guessing you're pretty unhappy. Recognize yourself in any of these behaviors?

• You look for ways to stay angry

How do you spend an average work night? Do you replay the day's Horror Highlights in your head? Do you fume about how much writing you could have done if only you didn't have to work? Do you start obsessing about the toxic nature of your office culture? Spend your evenings thinking about the Day Job Monster, and you can guarantee you'll be anxious, angry and frustrated most of the time.

• You argue with your partner a lot more than you used to

Do you complain about the tedium of the day to your partner until he or she can really take no more? This habit can quickly develop into a nightly screaming match about how you can't handle your job. You end up feeling lonely, misunderstood, and desperately unhappy. When you'd rather be writing full time, your day job is going to frustrate you. It's unavoidable. But the fact you have to work to pay the bills is probably not your partner's fault. And, it's true, maybe your partner doesn't really get the full picture.

People who are not stuck in a job that's driving them nuts can never fully comprehend the misery of the day job world. If your partner doesn't understand the agony you endure on a daily basis, you may have to find a way to be forgiving. Because you need the good parts of your life. They remind you of what's really important; they give you the strength to face the Monster, and to keep working on your writing dream.

• You're addicted to negative emailing

Isn't it tempting to arrive at work, fire up your computer and start the day by emailing the three human beings in your building about the appalling quality of your life? It might make you feel better for a couple of minutes. Only thing is, you'll get a volley of negativity in return. Because other people are also struggling with their Day Job Monsters. Do you want to take on their problems as well? Surely your own experience is painful enough! And what if you email that savagely sarcastic message to the wrong cubicle dweller by mistake? Before long, the boss gets to read it, and suddenly your day becomes so very much worse.

• You've become very friendly with a bartender

After a hard day of Monster grind, it's all too easy to reach for the vodka. Or the whisky, gin, wine or beer. Because, let's face it, alcohol works. After a few stiff ones, you'll definitely feel better. With the sharp, spiky edges of the day nicely softened, it's easier to forget about the office reality. But after another Tuesday night of Martini Madness, you won't sleep too well. You'll wake up bleary, nauseous, and possibly even more depressed tedium of the day to your partner until he or she can really take no more? This habit can quickly develop into a nightly screaming match about how you can't handle your job. You end up feeling lonely, misunderstood, and desperately unhappy. When you'd rather be writing full time, your day job is going to frustrate you. It's unavoidable. But the fact you have to work to pay the bills is probably not your partner's fault. And, it's true, maybe your partner doesn't really get the full picture.

People who are not stuck in a job that's driving them nuts can never fully comprehend the misery of the day job world. If your partner doesn't understand the agony you endure on a daily basis, you may have to find a way to be forgiving. Because you need the good parts of your life. They remind you of what's really important; they give you the strength to face the Monster, and to keep working on your writing dream.

• You're addicted to negative emailing

Isn't it tempting to arrive at work, fire up your computer and start the day by emailing the three human beings in your building about the appalling quality of your life? It might make you feel better for a couple of minutes. Only thing is, you'll get a volley of negativity in return. Because other people are also struggling with their Day Job Monsters. Do you want to take on their problems as well? Surely your own experience is painful enough! And what if you email that savagely sarcastic message to the wrong cubicle dweller by mistake? Before long, the boss gets to read it, and suddenly your day becomes so very much worse.

• You've become very friendly with a bartender

After a hard day of Monster grind, it's all too easy to reach for the vodka. Or the whisky, gin, wine or beer. Because, let's face it, alcohol works. After a few stiff ones, you'll definitely feel better. With the sharp, spiky edges of the day nicely softened, it's easier to forget about the office reality. But after another Tuesday night of Martini Madness, you won't sleep too well. You'll wake up bleary, nauseous, and possibly even more depressed tway to be forgiving. Because you need the good parts of your life. They remind you of what's really important; they give you the strength to face the Monster, and to keep working on your writing dream.

• You're addicted to negative emailing

Isn't it tempting to arrive at work, fire up your computer and start the day by emailing the three human beings in your building about the appalling quality of your life? It might make you feel better for a couple of minutes. Only thing is, you'll get a volley of negativity in return. Because other people are also struggling with their Day Job Monsters. Do you want to take on their problems as well? Surely your own experience is painful enough! And what if you email that savagely sarcastic message to the wrong cubicle dweller by mistake? Before long, the boss gets to read it, and suddenly your day becomes so very much worse.

• You've become very friendly with a bartender

After a hard day of Monster grind, it's all too easy to reach for the vodka. Or the whisky, gin, wine or beer. Because, let's face it, alcohol works. After a few stiff ones, you'll definitely feel better. With the sharp, spiky edges of the day nicely softened, it's easier to forget about the office reality. But after another Tuesday night of Martini Madness, you won't sleep too well. You'll wake up bleary, nauseous, and possibly even more depressed t! And what if you email that savagely sarcastic message to the wrong cubicle dweller by mistake? Before long, the boss gets to read it, and suddenly your day becomes so very much worse.

• You've become very friendly with a bartender

After a hard day of Monster grind, it's all too easy to reach for the vodka. Or the whisky, gin, wine or beer. Because, let's face it, alcohol works. After a few stiff ones, you'll definitely feel better. With the sharp, spiky edges of the day nicely softened, it's easier to forget about the office reality. But after another Tuesday night of Martini Madness, you won't sleep too well. You'll wake up bleary, nauseous, and possibly even more depressed than you were yesterday. And just try facing the Monster with a hangover! Now that's a real challenge.

• You find comfort in the fridge

Hating your day job is hard work. It's easy to build up a healthy appetite fighting back those waves of office depression. So three helpings of Butter Chicken for lunch is a tempting idea. Each bite will offer temporary comfort. But too much food will quickly make you feel even worse. Don't let the Monster tempt you to eat yourself into a deeper depression - having to buy a whole new wardrobe of office clothes in a larger size doesn't do much for your mood, let me tell you.

Can you see yourself in any of these behaviors?

Could you be making your day job even harder than it has to be? The good news is that you can make your working life easier on yourself. These kinds of responses to the day job are simply bad habits. You've developed them as a desperate response to a traumatic work environment. And habits can be broken. When you break habits like these, you reduce the Day Job Monster's power to ruin your quality of life. Your day job is just not that important in the wider scheme of things. It doesn't define you. In fact, it probably barely interests you!

Tether that Monster to the leg of your desk, and you can get back to noticing the good parts of your life. They include your partner, friends, hobbies, and the ways you relax and have fun. And they also include the kind of work that does matter - your manuscript.

This article may be freely reprinted, as long as the biography is included. I'd love it if you'd send me a link if you use my work!